

If you’ve never seen Three Dev Adem, you are missing how awful real-life superheroes would be
This week in Badass Apocalyptic News for Gents — real-life superheroes are here at last!
Gentlemen! We are yet again one day closer to the future. Well, at least all of the futures in alternate timelines that B.A.N.G. chooses to monitor. Things have been quiet in the office of late — the other day we watched some debriefings on spiders. You know, the terrible eight-legged monsters that will soon evolve into their most terrifying forms yet once adorable children (or spider secret agents) convince the first private space flight to take spiders along? (To be fair, spiders have already conquered the space station anyways.)
But we’re not in danger yet. We must remain calm, and instead focus on the ways in which our own species is preparing for the end times – the ways in which mankind is evolving and indeed, mutating. The following individuals have shown themselves to the world, and will likely be feared before they are adored. But once the robots, dinosaurs, and deadly neighborhood spider-men come…well, we’ll need a hero.more










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